SHOW ME THE WAY, TAKE ME TO LOVE….

I am currently obsessed with Bride and Prejudice. It’s a 2004 remake of Jane Austen’s novel but I happen to have only just seen it.
I have seen it about ten times in less than a week and I find myself going over my favourite scenes several times a day. *Heehee*

The last time I had a similar obsession was two years ago when I saw Contract. I didn’t write about it though, only gushed about the lead actor here. And that’s the thing about my movie obsessions, they usually include a massive crush on the male lead.

Why I am obsessed with B&P (as I discovered it’s been nicknamed):
#The brightness and colour as one reviewer put it. I love colour. That’s why I loved Bend It Like Beckham. I love this East meets West thing Chadha does.
#The romance story. Been a sucker since I was born and life has not cured me apparently.
#Aishwarya Rai! Her beauty is enough to make anyone stare at the screen for hours and she is a good actress too. Or maybe I’ve been so traumatized by the underwhelming excuse for acting in Nollywood that any semblance of passable acting gets 3 thumbs up from me. Don’t ask me where the extra digit comes from. Just take it like that and be going.
#Still on Ash….. the first time I saw her was sometime in ’07 when she became the face of L’Oreal I think. I just kept gushing about how ‘mammy-water’ like her beauty was. Everything about her face is so perfect. And since then, I sometimes think to myself how I’ve never seen anyone else as beautiful as she is. When I read online that in some quarters she is referred to as the most beautiful woman in the world (and not just because she was Miss World ’94), I found myself vigorously nodding in agreement. Nne the nwa amaka. Dazz all.
#I love not-too-serious feel good movies. That’s usually my first question whenever anyone recommends a movie.
“Oh you’ll like it,” they say
“Really.” I answer, “is it a feel good movie?”
Plenty eye rolling
You get the gist.

#I thought the movie had some hilarious dialogue and scenes as well. Their mother could have been any Nigerian mother with their plenty drama.
Anyway I love anything that makes me laugh..

I read the original Pride and Prejudice some decades ago when I was about 12 so my recollection wasn’t very good and hence I sat down to see the movie with an open mind – free of preconceptions (pun intended).
The interesting part of this obsession for me is that I am actually indifferent about the male lead. I liked them together and the chemistry was cute but it was the female lead I actually fell in love with. I think her beauty just undermines everything else around her.
But it was the love between Balraj and her sister I preferred. In short, let me confess, it was Balraj I liked. If they had replaced her sister with an inflatable doll I probably would not have noticed let alone cared. I think with age and time, I have gotten over the enemies-at-first-then-lovers-later kind of romance. The he-sees-her-likes-her-and-can’t-keep-his-hands-off-her type is the one I root for now. I know the story was not about them but I wish they’d had more lovey dovey scenes.

My favourite scenes:
#The point where Balraj spotted her on the balcony and stood transfixed with his mouth half open (priceless)
#The part where Ash was smiling and clapping with her sister on the balcony. Her smile was exceptional abeg.
#Balraj’s dancing. I think I just have a mini crush.
#The two-second pool scene with Balraj and Jaya. Why, biko did we not see more?
#At the garba where Balraj had his hair pulled back. I am not sure what the feeling that gave me is called.
#The wedding where he was Not Kissing his bride. These Indians and their propriety sef. Just frustrating people for nothing.

The lines that I loved:
#Indira translating the songs for Darcy. I like her too. She seemed to be in a perpetual state of amusement.
#Mya the amebo reporting Lakhi to Lakota. I laffed tire. Siblings are the same everywhere.
#When the mother was complaining at breakfast and Lakhi was mimicking her.
#Lakhi to Johnny ” what are you looking at? Look at me.”
#Their mother’s lament: “my fate is to live in that old house full of spinsters with no grandchildren.” Talk about drama queenship!

Another thing I liked: the wooing.
I wonder why people here don’t woo like that. All the fun trips and parties. And helicopter rides and everything.
I find myself wondering if it is the economic crunch or the hustle, that ensures every waking moment is spent on the grind, that prevents proper wooing. Dating is so boring these days and mechanical. Abi is it just film people that are confusing me?

I found this two-year old post in my drafts, along with 60-ish other posts that may or may never get published. I wonder why I never published this. Maybe I could not think of a proper ending. Oh well, manage am like that.

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